Session 34: Learning to Notice Your Own Progress

When you are working on recovery, it can feel like there is always something else that needs attention. There is another habit you want to change, another relationship that still needs work, another difficult day to get through, another goal somewhere ahead of you. When you are constantly looking at what still needs to happen, it is very easy to miss what already has.

You may be doing better than you give yourself credit for.

We tend to think progress has to be something big before it deserves to be celebrated. A major anniversary. A new job. A restored relationship. A certain number of days, months, or years. Those milestones absolutely matter, but they are not the only things that count.

Sometimes progress looks like answering the phone when you normally would have isolated. Maybe you recognized that you were getting overwhelmed and walked away before things got worse. Maybe you went to a meeting when you really did not feel like going. Maybe you apologized instead of defending yourself. Maybe you made it through a craving. Maybe you told someone the truth. Maybe you woke up after a bad day and decided to try again.

Those things count too.

One of the strange parts of personal growth is that you are there for every single day of it. Because change often happens slowly, you may not notice how much has changed. Think about somebody you have not seen in several years. The differences in their appearance may seem obvious to you because you remember them as they were. They probably do not notice those changes nearly as much because they have looked in the mirror every day.

Recovery can be like that. You are living inside the process, so sometimes somebody else notices your growth before you do.

There is nothing wrong with stopping long enough to acknowledge it. Being proud of yourself does not mean you think you are finished. Celebrating progress does not mean you can stop doing the work. It simply means recognizing that the work you have already done mattered.

Maybe you have spent a lot of your life hearing about what you did wrong. Maybe you became very good at identifying your failures and very uncomfortable acknowledging anything positive about yourself. If that is the case, celebrating progress might actually take some practice.

Start small. Think about where you were six months ago or a year ago. What do you handle differently now? What have you learned about yourself? What situations do you respond to differently? What is something you can do today that once felt impossible?

Then allow yourself to say, “I’m proud of that.”

You do not need a party. You do not need anyone else's permission. Sometimes celebration is simply recognizing that you kept going when it would have been easier to quit.

There will always be another step ahead of you. Just remember to occasionally turn around and look at how many steps you have already taken.